I have been told many many times in the past that I can get so angry. I remember fighting with my high school sweetheart and him telling me that I am such an angry person and I would cry explaining how I had no idea why. It wasn’t until years later when I finally realized that I wasn’t really angry but anxious! I noticed a not so nice trend that would involve an increased level of anxiety and that anxiety turning into anger. I would then get angry because I didn’t know why I was angry!
I have yelled and screamed at my husband when he has become sick, I have hung up the phone on my mom when she told me her stomach hurt, and I have fussed at my daughter when she got an unknown rash. I am so embarrassed by all of this. These are things I can’t take back.
In the last year or so I have been really working on my anger and trying to not react so quickly. Instead of bursting out in anger at my husband when he says he doesn’t feel good, I tell him how i really feel and I sometimes yell it to make myself feel better. Instead of saying mean things angrily, I might say loudly “I am very upset that you are not feeling good and my anxiety is very heightened at the moment” He usually laughs when I do this which makes me feel better. He then goes on to reassure me he will be just fine and so will I.
Thanks for reading,